Sunday, November 19, 2006

CBH Solocast Controversey: Cappy Happy due to Inevitable Relapsey?

INTERNET, Atlantic City: In a shocking turn of events, it has come to our attention that something may indeed be foul in the state of Jersey. On the eve of the CBH Solocast voting polls, it has been rumored that one of the members may have relied upon illegal, performance-enhancing drugs during the production of their episode.
Beloved roustabout Cappy, a naivish waif better known for his misguided attempts at wooing museum tour guides than his expertise within the realm of podcasting, recently shocked the world with a ballot-shattering Solocast submission. Unsubstantiated rumors stemming from the Schooly G camp are implying that Cappy could quite possibly have used steroids to achieve his high results.
Drug testing within the CBH world has previously been handled under the "Don't Ask, Don't Bogart" clause, a rather lenient policy which may need to be rectified for future endeavors. "I hope to God he didn't do something stupid," said CBH co-founder DJ Sloofus. "When I sober up, I'm going to sit down and have a stern talking with that young man. Or maybe one of the young bitches that lives near him, at least." CBH News will provide updates to this story as they become available.


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